The real reason you get transition anxiety

I know how anxious you might feel before your stepkids come over. 

And heck maybe you feel that way before they leave too depending on your situation. 

All of that anxiety is very normal. 

But having your stepkids come over, or dealing with a difficult transition afterward, isn’t actually the root cause of your anxiety. 

The real reason you feel so anxious is that your brain is anticipating and worrying about all of the bad things that may or may not actually happen. 

Things like: 

My spouse and I will fight again. 

My stepkids won’t listen. 

I will feel left out. 

These things MAY happen for sure. 

But being anxious about them doesn’t actually prevent them from happening – it just makes you feel…well…anxious. 

So the solution then? 

Expect the kids not to listen – and then plan ahead of time for how you’ll handle it on purpose. 

Expect that you’ll want to nag your spouse or start a fight – and then decide ahead of time what you’ll do instead 

So when your mind wants to wander and think about all of the bad things that may happen on transition days, you can remind yourself: “Yep. And I can handle it. I’ve got a plan.”