Do you ever feel like your marriage is being sabotaged by the other bio-parent?
If this is you, I want you to know that this is all too common and you are not alone.
Maybe he or she tells the kiddos to ignore you, or not to listen to you.
Maybe he or she has banned you from attending the kids’ sporting events.
Maybe he or she is actively trying to get back together with your spouse.
And all of this can totally suck.
But – here’s the thing:
Just like you can’t force this person to stop causing all the drama – (and I’m sure you’ve tried!) – the other bio-parent also doesn’t control you, your marriage, or how you react.
Imagine this: there is a world in which this person still won’t stop texting your partner AND…
Instead of getting upset, you’re totally nonchalant about it because you feel confident in yourself and your marriage.
And maybe no one ever taught you how to control your reactions in this way – and that’s OK. I know I definitely wasn’t taught how to do that in school.
But controlling your reactions is a skill you can learn.
If you’re like – OK. Yes, Kristin. Tell me more…
The first step is to remind yourself of all the ways that the other bio-parent is truly NOT in control of you, your marriage, and your reactions.
This person gets to say whatever he or she wants to your spouse but doesn’t control the love you guys have for one another.
This person may not allow you to come to sporting events, but he or she doesn’t control the interactions you have with your stepkids when they’re in your home.
Not letting the other bio-parent control the health of your marriage and your own happiness can be as simple as making the most of what’s truly in your control – and letting go of the rest.
You’ve got this.