When I learned what happened, I felt like garbage

So my husband realized it first. 

He called me into one of his kids’ bedrooms, and said:

“Look, this child has been stealing things from you, and our other kids.” 

And I immediately felt like garbage. 

So, I spent a few days feeling like garbage – 

Blaming myself in my head – 

“If you were a better, more loving, more supportive parent – this wouldn’t have happened.” 

But then I remembered something I so often share with my clients: 

The only reason I felt like garbage is because of the way I was blaming myself. 

I was the cause of my own suffering. 

Sure, I don’t have to love the stealing. 

But I don’t have to make this child’s stealing behavior mean something awful about me as a parent, or a human. 

And soon as I remembered this, I stopped feeling like trash. 

And I felt ready to go back to loving this child, unconditionally – 

Accepting them exactly as they are, even when they do things to me I don’t like. 

Because that’s what feels good to me. 

(And yes, I’m still gonna buy a lockbox for certain special items  ).